When we found out I was pregnant, we started looking for daycares in the area. Why wouldn’t I continue to work? On top of the tiny life brewing in my belly, we had a new mortgage, a new car payment, and lots of lovely workmates and a career that I love. But, Ollie had different ideas on how life should be and with his prematurity, we thought it best to keep him out of daycares and the germs they famously promote.
So I haven’t worked full time in almost a year.
In the months since, my family has set me up on a couple “blind dates,” if you will.
Someone in my life has met another mom and thought, “Lisa would like her; I should set them up, they will be friends.”
But I can’t get over the idea that these meetings are essentially Blind Dates. Using the same thought process that might have been used if I were single and looking for a romantic mate, my husband has thought, “this woman could be my wife’s pal.” This woman could help complete my life, to fulfill my need for a buddy in mommy-hood.
They’re odd, these dates. It’s like an interview. The same interviews I went on when I was in the process of meeting my husband.
The wrong answer could destroy these baby friendships; a wrong word could make me seem callous…or even gulp “attached”, and the decision is made right then and there that this match is “not the right fit for our needs at this time.”
Like a “real” date, I can tell when they go well. I tell my husband that I liked That Mom and the person responsible for the other set-up calls the next day and says, “Oh, This Mom really liked you, she wants to go out again.”
I recall the meeting. I was poised, funny, didn’t burp or fart loudly, didn’t drop the F-bomb and saved my secrets for when This Mom is ready for them. I realize I “still got it.”
The second date is being planned, I’m afraid I won’t live up to my first impression. I’m afraid that spark won’t be there again.
Kinda like my second date with my husband.